{"product_id":"twerk-o-meter","title":"TWERK-O-METER","description":"\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eUntil now, mankind could have only dreamt of this level of ingenuity… \u003cstrong\u003eWITH BONUS STICKERS!\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eKIT INCLUDES: Base plate, max adhesion disc, calibrated screw, and BONUS STICKERS! \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e(Booty Bait not included)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eLeave it to a \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTHE OG \u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003ecomedic bait company to develop the ultimate utilitarian bait and then deliver the multi-purpose display base as promised. What was once a fishing lure designed for maximum efficiency, is now the most entertaining analog metering device you can slap on your *blank*\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTHINGS TO SLAP IT ON (NOT LIMITED TO)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDesk\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDashboard\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFlight Control Panel\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHelm\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBike\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBroadsword\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePrinter\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eetc.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eJOBS IT CAN KINDA DO (NOT LIMITED TO)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSeismic Detection Device (earthquakes \u0026amp; stuff)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTilt Meter (off-roading)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eG-Meter (on-roading\/drifting)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSuspension Feedback Device (rumbler)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eLaunch Meter (when accelerating)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBrake Meter (when braking)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOscillation Detector (skyscrapers)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eetc.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eMade right here in the office, \u003cstrong\u003eUSA\u003c\/strong\u003e. Next to the guy who plays Toad in the toon. In fact we actually kicked him out of his desk to put this brand new 3-D printer in his place. Now we have to pay for the printer, forget the other guy, he’s just fine with the plywood and cinder blocks we have setup for him in the alley. And before you go \u003cstrong\u003e“wow that’s\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eexpensive” \u003c\/strong\u003ejust know this printer cost us a lot of money and \u003cstrong\u003ewe convinced the professor to let us buy it if we can pay it off, but his stipulation was only that the first product has to benefit human curiosity in science. \u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003eSo now we have this, and we need you to tag us and collect data so we can establish the \u003cstrong\u003eTWERK SCALE\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDISCLAIMER:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e By purchasing a MULTIPURPOSE ANALOG TWERK-O-METER (KIT) you assume all responsibility associated with from assembly to sticking it on something. Not us… if you’re here buying our stuff it just proves you were raised right (probably) and we trust you’ll make fun-tastic decisions with your stuff you buy from us. But for realzies though, we bare zero responsibility. We made this so you could have hands free twerking.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Big Booty Bait Co.","offers":[{"title":"Orange","offer_id":55875068723368,"sku":null,"price":10.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black","offer_id":55875068756136,"sku":null,"price":10.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0620\/0823\/0056\/files\/04A0E8CE-A9C7-443F-94A9-F6B72F70E791.jpg?v=1786862778","url":"https:\/\/aberrantstuff.myshopify.com\/products\/twerk-o-meter","provider":"AberrantStuff","version":"1.0","type":"link"}